These last few weeks have been extremely tough on me. After the death of a dear friend, my room mate dropping out of school, and making a couple bad decisions, I have emerged into spring break breathless, barely passing, and scythed. I have been told if I don’t catch-up and keep-up with my class in Capstone I will fail. Read the post above this one for more details. I need to back-track here.
The following are a couple of my discussion posts from clinicals (with some parts edited of course). 2/9/19 When we were watching a chemical code for SVT The nurse shift manager came in and was overseeing everything to be sure it was being done correctly. She even questioned the Doctor on his use of medication. I think that would be so awesome to know that much, and have that presence, and be respected as an authority to go so far as to question the Doctor in a code. That part was very interesting. I think all of those nurses present in that moment knew what they were doing, how to do it, and how to be calm of mind no matter what.
One of my patients was in pain due to a multitude of factors. The nurse checked his pain medications and he couldn’t have more medication for an hour or so. She told him she’d be back in an hour to give him the medicine. It bothered me that this patient had uncontrolled pain and we were not going to sufficiently alleviate it in any way. I tried to help him reposition and he thanked me for trying something…… for trying something. This week I came to the tangible realization that, at the very least, we should TRY something to help our patients when they have a need. The psycho-social and physiological aspects of this interaction are irrelevant to this point. Doing nothing to meet a patients needs is just not an acceptable option.
This week seemed to be more challenging for me than usual. First of all we have to get up before the sun and my brain does not appreciate that. Secondly I have not been as clear minded this week. All of that aside both clinical days pushed me up against ethical and professional boundaries, provided many learning opportunities, and brought to light many personal strengths and weaknesses. The first day I was in the ICU and I learned a lot. I got to watch an extubation and listen to the mother who had no right to know what was going on with the patient. I had to be careful of what I said d/t our location and HIPPA. I did portray more uncertainty in my student role and lower confidence than I would have liked to this week. I also did not do a very good job of communicating what was going on with me to my nurse on day and I didn’t even realize it until the end of the shift. I feel like I’m usually better at communication and multitasking than I was this Wednesday. I also do usually jump right in and portray more confidence than I did this week. I am still finding that balance.
Besides an extubation, this week I was able to watch a thoracentesis. The instructor helped me realize that, until now, I have been trying to meld head-to-toe assessments and body systems together when I’m documenting. I have wondered why it was so hard to document in a systematic way….
This week I was also able to comfort someone whose loved one passed away a few minutes after I had left the room. I had spoken with the patient moments earlier and tried to give her a few words of peace and comfort. She smiled a faint smile, so I knew she had heard. We are in a crazy field where you can walk from one room to the next and experience immense joy and then intense sadness. We hold peoples hands at some of the most pivotal moments in their lives and our own struggles are constantly suppressed. Nursing is not for the faint of heart.
-Faint of heart
The RN journey 